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YOU CAN NOW JOIN/ RENEW/ BUY ONLINE
@rchers @narchists have been dragged kicking and
screaming into the 21st century and you can now join
or renew your membership of @@ at the click of a
mouse. Newsletter No 35 is now available to paid-up
anarchists.
FILL’S MURDER GOES UNNOTICED
Ambridge appears to be the only place in the
country where people can be peacefully murdered in
their armchair without anyone being the slightest
bit interested. No one at all has commented on the
cause of Fill’s death, including Foghorn and the
whole ghastly Archer family. Does Borsetshire not
have a coroner?
BABY NAUSEA
Ambridge seems to be suffering from a severe
overload of babies and baby-related discussion. We
had Orrible Oscar, now we have Kate’s latest sprog
and Abbey National and to make matters worse wall to
wall discussion of Hellin wanting to impregnate
herself because she can’t keep a bloke for more than
five minutes.
JAILBIRD’S BONANZA
Jailbird Carter must be on barely the minimum
wage doing what little she does in the shop, so it
was quite a surprise that there was such widespread
discussion between filthy rich Fagash Lil and the
sole owner of the Bank of Peggoi about whether to
pay her an extra month’s salary as part of her
pay-off. But Jailbird herself seemed to feel all her
financial troubles are at an end on hearing the
news. Not sure what she is planning to live off in
two months time.
NO VILLAGE PRODUCTION PLEASE!
It was with great alarm that we heard that the
Run your shop with slave labour committee were
contemplating a village play or worse still a talent
show. There is no talent in Ambridge – fact.
PEEP’S NORMALITY CONTINUES
At least one Ambridge teenager is behaving
normally. Peep is a breath of fresh air since she
has started being rude to her parents, getting it
together with someone old enough to be her
grandfather and skipping lectures. She will be up
the duff before you can say Hellin, while Hellin
will still be doing things with a turkey baster that
we don’t want to hear about.
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SHOP IN BORCHESTER CAMPAIGN
We would like to encourage all Ambridge residents
to shop at “The Supermarket” in Borchester. It is
better value than the Village Shop, you won’t be
scowled at by A Net or Jailbird Carter and you will
help consign the Community Shop to the same dustbin
of forgotten Ambridge ideas that houses Ts, The
Organ Fund, The Belltower Fund, Boules competitions,
Twinning and Phil.
Ambridge Exposed – a book of @narchic poems
from Barbara Williams

If you are looking for presents for the
people who have everything (and assuming they have
mugs and t shirts available from this site) can we
commend to you this new book from @narchist Barbara
Williams. Copies are available from Lulu.com
http://www.lulu.com/content/4876284 at just
£5.99
Take the latest @rchers @narchists surveys
Everyone wants to slap at least one Ambridge
resident. You can vote every 30 mins for the most
deserving denizen |